One week.
One week is all I have left before I head back to the corporate jungle and say goodbye to my full time mom status. Just thinking about how I'd spend every day away from my baby already makes my heart ache. :(
June 15 is my first day back on the grind, far from the sweet smiles and cute cries of my 2-month old. It's going to be the first time I'll be separated from her, and the anxiety I feel now is almost as intense as when I was about to go into labor. :( I wonder how other moms did it the first time. I'm gonna need some serious advice.
Lia usually dozes off to dreamland after her bath. This whole morning, however, she stayed awake and alert, and her eyes were always on me. I guess she felt what I was and still am feeling, and maybe she's a little sad too. Maybe she stayed up so we could talk and cuddle more, so I could enjoy her longer. Haaaay, nase-senti ako. :( I hope my baby will not forget me. I hope she would still love me more than her nanny even if she'll be spending longer hours with her. I hope she would still recognize my face, my hugs, and my kisses when I get home. :(
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| Fighting off the urge to sleep so she could play with mommy |
Oh well, I'm just gonna have to endure it and face reality. It's not as if I don't miss working, because I do. I really do. I miss wearing my thinking hat, I miss my office desk and even the clutter, I miss my office friends, I miss being busy with work. I just wonder how differently it would feel now, now that I'm gonna leave my heart at home with my baby. I bet it's going to require more focus and concentration, but with God's grace, I know I can do it.
Please wish me luck.
